Steady – Breathing Exercises App

screenshot-play.google.com-2020.06.11-21_02_25

There’s a lot of anxiety and other mental health concerns around at the moment related to the coronavirus pandemic lockdown, and so anything that can help us is welcome.

Steady is an Android app that I’ve started using on my smartphone. I recently came across this recommended app in a magazine and expected to have to pay for it, but it appears to be free with no adverts.

Breathing exercises are a really helpful way of relieving anxiety and stress, and this app helps you tackle your anxiety. It also provides daily reminders and encouragement for hitting monthly goals and the like.

Update: I’ve discovered there’s also a free app (Insomnia) to help you sleep, this can be accessed via the above app.

A Year of Us (Naomi Ager)

2020-04-22_143725

Naomi and I have been considering the adverse effect the coronavirus pandemic lockdown can have on couples, especially those (like us) with young children. I posted something to this effect on Facebook today, not because we had fallen out, but because we both recognise that couples need to work harder on their relationships in times of crisis. This is her guest post. Thank you Naomi, I love you.

I saw this book on Amazon and, given the stress we find ourselves under as a family, but more so as a couple in these days of lockdown, I thought engagement in a couple’s journal together might work in some way to deepen our connection and allow us to explore each other and not lose sight of ‘us’.

There’s always something else you can learn about the person you love whether you’ve been together for a week or 60 years. By sitting together each evening to explore the 365 interesting questions laid out in this book, I feel it will give us a beautiful insight into our hopes and dreams, as well as our most desperate needs that perhaps are going by the wayside right now.

I’m personally finding it difficult to do something as simple as engaging in meaningful conversation when the children have gone to bed. But, having explored this book prior to us starting it together, I think it will give us the opportunity to bring up issues whether deep and heartfelt or more whimsical in nature.

In this period of lockdown, it’s more important than ever to maintain healthy discussions as a couple and to ensure important things are openly talked about. Things such as family finance and sex life (for example) and hopes for now and the future when we are eventually released back into the big wide world again.

It’s also important to talk about our hobbies and interests with each other, and in turn to encourage the person we share our lives with and love with the things that interest them. I want to take even more of an interest and have a better understanding of what interests John. So maybe I’ll read up on stars, planets, space and the universe or listen to one of his weird and wonderful music albums.

Making time to talk about our interests outside of homeschooling the children and general survival at this time, in my opinion, can only solidify the foundation of our relationship and improve life massively, especially whilst living under such pressure.

I plan to share a lot of the daily questions with my friends on Facebook, so they too can sit with their other half, turn off the television, put pen to paper and learn a little more about each other.

Digital Wellbeing (Sue Thomas)

93323005_3153088908067717_7929417842200412160_n

Our lives crossed when I lived in Leicester and we’ve been Facebook friends since. Sue Thomas has some important things to say about digital wellbeing and I’m pleased she agreed to write a guest post for me. Her book is excellent, click here for details.

I have spent the last 15 years researching the connections between nature and our digital lives, trying to find out whether it is possible to get a real connection with nature through technology. After speaking with and studying many important thinkers in the technology industry, environmental psychology, design, and urban planning, I felt certain that it is.

At times, my findings have been seen as controversial, but today in the COVID-19 epidemic that has changed. Now, digital wellbeing is becoming a lifeline for people stuck indoors for days and weeks on end. Some of the techniques I learnt about, such as watching nature on screens, following wild animal webcams, and listening to recorded birdsong, are being recommended by health experts. More and more researchers now know that such activities reduce stress and anxiety. Even playing a video game with natural landscapes can promote mental wellbeing!

So here are a few tips to help you get the benefits of nature while you’re stuck indoors during the epidemic.

  1. First things first – what can you see from your windows? If nothing much, consider moving the furniture around. A good view of greenery, trees, or even just more sky, can slow your heart rate and help you relax.
  2. When you’re browsing through Instagram, don’t swipe too fast. Take a moment to stop and appreciate the breath-taking sunrises, evocative dusks, gorgeous landscapes and intoxicating blooms. Imagine the texture of those leaves and petals. Recall the scent of that bluebell wood. Remember running your fingers along the bark of that oak tree? The sensuous outdoors is right there in your phone.
  3. Choose a new wallpaper for your phone or computer screen. Research has shown that pictures of dense groups of leafy trees are very calming, so why not search for a jungle or forest? Then make sure you set time aside on a regular basis to just be with that image and sink into it, perhaps even meditate for a short while.
  4. Do you usually ignore your houseplants? Now you have the time to give them some love and be rewarded with a relaxing biophilic experience. Gently clean their leaves with cotton wool and warm water, make sure the pot is moist and they have the light level they need. Chat to them if you like. There are benefits for both of you.
  5. Search for recordings of birdsong. They are everywhere online but the BBC is a good place to start. If you can listen with headphones that’s even better. Just allow your senses to fill with the memories of all the times in the past when you have wandered through a wood, sat in the park or just been out in the garden, yet never paid proper attention to the birds. Now you have the time to do just that. Enjoy!

Other Information: Sue Thomas is the author of Nature and Wellbeing in the Digital Age, available from Amazon in Kindle and Paperback. Visit her Facebook Page. She’s also on Twitter: @suethomas and Instagram: Digital_Wellbeing.

Sue also blogs here: https://suethomasnet.wordpress.com

See also: Recognising Birdsong

Facing Challenges

adult aged baby care
Photo by icon0.com on Pexels.com

The challenges we face at the moment are many and interconnected. They are shared challenges, yet deeply individual at the same time. I believe we’re all trying to do our best, whilst admitting the collective need to lower expectations of ourselves and others. Many things in this crisis are counterintuitive. like desiring human contact but needing to stay apart. It’s OK to admit we’re not OK, whilst at the same time supporting and encouraging others. We need each other more than ever in these hard times, we’re all hurting and struggling.

We’re learning valuable lessons about ourselves and discovering the things that are important for our emotional and mental wellbeing, our relationship values and working lives. I believe we’ll emerge from this stronger people, better able to take our place in a changing society. Stay strong and stay safe.

Social distance with emotional and spiritual connection.

 

Your Discomfort Is Grief

man in blue and brown plaid dress shirt touching his hair
Photo by Nathan Cowley on Pexels.com

We’re all finding life difficult at the moment in the current coronavirus pandemic, feeling overwhelmed and emotional, with so many questions.

A friend shared this article today and it rang a bell with me, it helped me to understand the struggle I’m having right now. The deep visceral emotions I’m experiencing are exactly those of grief, ones that resonate with what I felt (and to some extent still do) following the death of my mother last year.

But enough of me. Read this article for yourself, I’m sure you’ll find it helpful.

Harvard Business Review: That Discomfort You’re Feeling Is Grief

Should have gone to Specsavers!

article-2284175-18464A46000005DC-477_634x475

Those in the UK will readily appreciate the visual joke, but it clearly doesn’t take much working out. The title for this post is the tag line of adverts for the Specsavers chain of opticians and audiologists (yes, they do hearing tests as well).

It was over 10 years ago that I experienced a posterior vitreous detachment (PVD) in my right eye. This sounds serious, but it’s simply a condition where part of your vitreous gel comes away from the retina at the back of your eye. It can occur as part of the natural ageing process and causes no long term harm, although it’s vital it’s checked out because it can lead to more serious conditions. It was quite dramatic when it happened because I didn’t know what was going on, and it’s often associated with flashes in the peripheral vision, along with floaters and very tiny dots (red blood cells) in your vision. It all cleared up without any problems, although floaters are fact of life as you get older. Fortunately, the brain adapts and they become less obvious.

Just under 2 years ago, the same thing happened in my left eye. I was public speaking at the time, but this time I knew what was happening, so I just carried on. As soon as possible afterwards I attended the eye casualty department of my local hospital, and they confirmed what I thought had happened.

I’ve had some occasional problems with that eye ever since, and so when I booked my routine eye test I jumped at the chance to have an extended test (for £10) that examined the back of my eyes in far more detail. Everything was fine and I could read the line of letters below the one described as 20/20 vision, so I was a happy bunny and celebrated with a cappuccino at Costa Coffee next door!

I have to be vigilant though, the symptoms of PVD are similar to retinal detachment. So please have regular eye tests, as they can show up a whole variety of problems that can be dealt with early. Most importantly, if you suspect anything amiss (especially if something like a dark curtain comes across your vision), seek urgent medical attention immediately.

To look after your eyes on a day-to-day basis; make sure you keep well-hydrated, get plenty of sleep, and avoid stress. All of those things, of course, are good for your general health and wellbeing.

Time to Talk Day

social-tile

We live in an uncertain world, with many pressures in our day to day lives. The reality is that 1 in 4 of us will experience a mental health problem in any given year, so there has never been a better time to open up about the mental health challenges we face. The more conversations we have about mental health, the more myths we can bust and barriers we can break down, helping to end the isolation, shame and worthlessness that too many of us feel when experiencing a mental health problem.

Having had my own mental health issues in the past (although anxiety, stress and depression can still affect me) this is my heartfelt plea for everyone to open up and talk at more than just a superficial level.

The annual Time to Talk Day provides an opportunity for everyone to add to the wider conversation on social media, television and elsewhere. Here is an opportunity to reach out to others in meaningful ways and help address mental health stigma in society.

No one wants a slow watch!

IMG_20190824_172706_111

No one wants a slow watch, or do they? In our busy world, maybe we need to think again about the meaning of time and how we can best live in the present. The present is the only time we’re given to live in, the past has gone and the future is not guaranteed.

Last year (as our family is now complete and we’d celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary) I decided to buy Naomi an eternity ring, and because she knew I’d had my eye on a Slow Watch for a while, she bought me the watch in the photograph as an early retirement present (I retire in July this year).

I’ve had an app called TerraTime Pro on my mobile for a while now, and this has the concept of an hour hand that rotates once every twenty-four hours, rather than once every twelve hours. The idea is to reconnect with the rhythms of earth and sun, night and day, moon and stars. This is also the concept behind the one-hand of the Slow Watch.

A Slow Watch allows you to see the entire day in one view and experience time in a natural way. It fundamentally changes the way you look at your watch and gives a much better consciousness about the progression of the day. With only one glance at the watch, I get a good orientation of where I am in the day. Taking a closer look, I get a precise enough indication of the time.

This way of showing the time is inspired by the original clocks that were based on the sun clock. Those early clocks had only one hand and displayed all twenty-four hours, and you can still see them on some old church towers.

In modern life it’s so easy to chase the minutes and get stressed by time, maybe we’d all benefit from turning back time and being slow again.

Mind you, I currently only tend to wear it on my day off or holidays. Perhaps I’ll wear it more when I retire.