Stewart Park with Matilda

I seized the opportunity to have some Daddy/Matilda time while Naomi was out with Freddy and Pollyanna today. It’s great to be all together as a family, but equally important to have one-to-one parent and child times as they can really deepen relationships.

As I was thinking where we could go, one of the places I came up with was Stewart Park in Middlesbrough to see the animals. Without prompting, she said she wanted to go to a park with animals, so that was decided. We’re obviously in tune with each other and on the same wavelength.

We saw the animals and did all the usual stuff you do in a park on a sunny afternoon (including having ice creams) although she was quite happy making sandcastles and adding ‘details’ (her words not mine) of stones, leaves, pine cones and sticks. You can see all the photos here.

28/06/20 Shaping the Future

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This is my final Sunday message before I retire in a few days time. Technically, I’m on holiday, but I’ve been pleased to share these weekly thoughts during June.

I mentioned at my welcome in 2015 that moving to Wallsend was more than just a new chapter in my life and ministry as a follower and servant of Jesus Christ, it was a whole new section of the book. I’d married Naomi the previous year and we arrived with Freddy who was three months old. I now leave to retire with our completed family, Matilda and Pollyanna having been born during our time here.

At a time of change we naturally think about making a fresh start, sorting things out, reflecting on how we can do things better, and taking positive steps into the future.

Although the future is unknown, we can play our part to make it a better place. It has to start today, because the only place we can live is in the present. It’s said that there’s no time like the present. So, if we want to shape the future, we need to start today.

We don’t need a special occasion, or a time of change, even though it often helps. We can take positive steps that will help shape the future of our own individual lives and that of others at any time.

Let me share some lovely words by Denise Brine with you:

Father God, I seek your guidance,
For I have a part to play
In the shaping of tomorrow
By the way I live today.
Take my hopes, my dreams, my passions,
Take my strength, my weakness too.
Shape my life; fulfil your purpose;
Start today; make me like you.

If I want to shape tomorrow
Then I need to start today,
Seeking, Lord, a revelation
Of your will and of your way.
If my passions, prayers and lifestyle
Are the witness people see,
Do I need a reformation
Of your Kingdom-life in me?

My todays will shape tomorrow!
Does that prospect please your eyes?
Are there changes that must happen?
Are there faults to recognise?
Shape me as seems best to you, Lord,
Start today, and help me see
That tomorrow will be better
When your life is seen in me.

David (in Psalm 51) prays in verse 10: Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. The Message paraphrase words it in a very interesting way: God, make a fresh start in me, shape a Genesis week from the chaos of my life. Matthew Henry suggests that David is praying, Lord, fix me for the time to come.

Life isn’t easy for many people today, especially with the uncertainty of the coronavirus pandemic. We need to be there for them and for each other. We can share the best of humanity, as well as the love of God, by small acts of kindness to others. A simple smile, an offer of help, a genuine word of encouragement, beautiful actions of love.

We are pilgrims on a journey,
We are [together] on the road,
We are here to help each other,
Walk the mile and bear the load,

I will hold the Christlight for you,
In the night-time of your fear,
I will hold my hand out to you,
Speak the peace you long to hear.

May that prayer be answered in each of our lives as we daily move into an unknown future, but one into which we can all take a hopeful and positive contribution.

Richardson Dees Park in Wallsend

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Richardson Dees Park in Wallsend is a beautiful place to walk with some wonderful facilities, although these are not open in the current coronavirus pandemic. Indeed, it wasn’t possible for Wallsend Churches Working Together (WCWT) to hold their annual Good Friday commemoration and worship (with Wallsend Salvation Army band) in the bandstand this year.

Fortunately, we can still walk in the park and enjoy its beauty, and that’s just what we did as a family on the afternoon of Easter Sunday 2020. The northern end of the park is very close to where we live. Naomi concentrated on photos of our children, I focussed on nature. The above picture is a composite of the eight photos I took on a cloudy day.

Note: Many thanks to my friend and fellow Salvation Army officer Mark Kent for processing the photos for me.

Facing Challenges

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The challenges we face at the moment are many and interconnected. They are shared challenges, yet deeply individual at the same time. I believe we’re all trying to do our best, whilst admitting the collective need to lower expectations of ourselves and others. Many things in this crisis are counterintuitive. like desiring human contact but needing to stay apart. It’s OK to admit we’re not OK, whilst at the same time supporting and encouraging others. We need each other more than ever in these hard times, we’re all hurting and struggling.

We’re learning valuable lessons about ourselves and discovering the things that are important for our emotional and mental wellbeing, our relationship values and working lives. I believe we’ll emerge from this stronger people, better able to take our place in a changing society. Stay strong and stay safe.

Social distance with emotional and spiritual connection.

 

Northumbria Community

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In these bewildering times, you may find some solace and strength from the Northumbria Community, especially their regular Daily Prayer. These can be used by individuals, families and friends and can be easily shared over the telephone or via video calls. They can provide a much needed daily routine and a sense of grounding in a rapidly changing and confusing world, where we are all asking many questions and searching for answers that may not immediately be to hand.

Mother’s Day 2020

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I hadn’t been looking forward to leading two worship services on Mother’s Day this year, because it would have been my first after her death last year. In fact, I hadn’t really given my preparation much thought, possibly secretly hoping that it would go away. Not only did the thought of it awaken some powerful emotions that continue to lie barely below the surface of my day-to-day life, but there’s the ongoing emptiness of loss combined with the strange feeling of ‘lostness’ that occurs after the death of both parents, which may be magnified in me because I’m an only child of only children.

So there’s a sense of relief I’ll not have to minister to others in public on this sensitive occasion because of the coronavirus pandemic. But clearly, I’d rather have had my vulnerability and emotions laid bare than being in this current health crisis. Equally, I’ve discovered over the years that my ‘wearing my heart on my sleeve’ nature has been used by God in Christian ministry to bring comfort and strength to others, a very humbling experience. Central to my faith is the vulnerability of Jesus, demonstrated powerfully in his willingness to suffer and die. This reminds me that emotional openness and vulnerability must never be confused with weakness, for in our weakness we can be strong.

For this year, that’s all I’m going to say. I’ll leave others to share their thoughts, emotions and spiritual insights on Mother’s Day, and I’ll be pleased to read and share them.

Note: The photo of my mother and daughter Pollyanna was taken in 2018.

Freddy’s 5th Birthday Party

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Welcome to my world of children’s birthday parties, a place I didn’t expect to be inhabiting in my 60s, but that’s how life turns out sometimes. With two grown-up children and two grandchildren, how did this happen? I retire later this year!

That said, I’m loving being a father to three small children (Matilda is three and Pollyanna two) and it also keeps me young and active.

We decided to change the venue for the party at short notice because of a Coronavirus outbreak. The Parks was an excellent alternative venue, with a soft play area and party room. We used the Golden Chippy (our local fish and chip shop) for catering, even though it was four miles away from the venue, because we had 100% confidence that our order for pizzas (and other bits and pieces) would be ready at the exact time we wanted. They didn’t let us down.

Before the party, Freddy helped me compile a Spotify playlist for the occasion. If you’re interested you can find it here.

All things considered, it was an excellent party. A big thank you to my lovely wife Naomi for all the hard work preparing and delivering it, and for all that was involved in changing our plans at the last minute. I just did all the running around, fetching and carrying, and being silly with the children.

Thank you everyone for coming and for Freddy’s lovely cards and presents. We’ve got the children bathed and in bed now, so we’re both ready to relax.

See also here (from 2018) On Being an Older Father

Coronavirus Disruption

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We found out this morning that the venue we’d booked for Freddy’s 5th birthday party had a confirmed case of coronavirus. What should we do?

The venue was very helpful on the telephone and understood our predicament, accepting that we may have to cancel and make alternative plans. They’ve been told they can continue as normal, but they’re doing a deep clean today to reassure staff and customers.

We don’t want to panic and add to the problem, but what if parents and grandparents don’t turn up with their children and grandchildren? The current government policy is to contain and delay the inevitable outbreak as long as possible, so should we plan for later in the year?

Given that I’m in a high-risk category (my age, asthma and prone to chest infections), as well as the fact that others in the same situation will be there, should we make alternative plans?

Update: I guess this is the type of dilemma we’re all going have to face in one way or another in the coming days. In the end, we decided to make alternative plans, and I’m so grateful that my wife Naomi is dealing with all of the arrangements.

See also here: Freddy’s 5th Birthday Party

 

Unseen Promise

The promise of a better life is a tempting offer. For those living in poverty, in even the most beautiful parts of the world, the dream of providing for your family becomes a constant and agonising ache.

In the Philippines, a sun-kissed paradise of more than 7,000 tropical islands, one in five people live in poverty and the luscious setting shrouds an ugliness which lies beneath the surface. Preying on the vulnerable, traffickers deceive and exploit, enticing people with the promise of dreams fulfilled.

People who are desperate to support those they love, believe the lies and accept opportunities to journey away from home unaware of the reality which awaits them. The promises remain unseen and the dreams remain unrealised.

Traffickers see people merely as commodities, ignoring the truth of who they are – children of God, full of promise and dearly loved by the One who created them.

The Salvation Army is raising awareness of the reality of trafficking, mobilising communities to protect themselves, supporting survivors and helping to improve opportunities at home so the drive to leave is lessened.

Through prevention, protection and partnership, we are supporting people to reclaim the promise that exists within them and rebuild their lives.

If you would like to donate to support this work, you can donate online at donate.salvationarmy.org.uk/anti-trafficking

If you want to connect with The Salvation Army International Development UK on social media you can find us on Facebook, YouTube, Twitter and Instagram. Follow to hear about new campaigns and updates from our projects. You can also find out more here.

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! 1 John 3:1a

See also here: Hidden in Plain Sight

Second-hand presents? Discuss!

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This Christmas I’ve been reflecting on commercialisation of the season, along with general consumerism and materialism in society; have these three things brought us greater happiness, or should we be more aware of their dangers to the cohesiveness of family and social life?

One thing you certainly realise having children is the amount of packing that surrounds toys, as well as the amount of human effort and ingenuity needed to extract them. Not to mention all the plastic (both large and small) that comprises the packaging; plastic that is increasingly becoming a problem in our finite world.

With those thoughts in mind, I was delighted to receive two wonderful books. They’re second-hand hardbacks, and (in my view) are perfectly acceptable to give as presents. I’ll treasure them and read them every day for two years. Discuss.

See also New Every Morning.